Archive for the ‘journal’ category

Twenty years on

May 12, 2013

Copyright 2013 M2B


She happened upon his picture in a purge of her computer profiles. How long ago it was! When was it again? How many things had changed.

Life was so different now. Julian, in Med School and Katrina, just finishing high school…

She remembered back to when. Back when he sent her all those silly stories, and when she was actually considering…could it be that she *was* actually considering?

…those stories: filled with imaginings of lust; of carnal interludes and all-things, well…’forbidden’, for lack of a better word. Yes, she had considered such things herself, way back when they first met. It was WHERE they first met that everything began, actually. That ‘Kink’ site, honest-to-god. Was it still in existence?

Not that it mattered anymore. Was all really just kids’ stuff, wasn’t it. Good fun; good for…an orgasm! (shh!) or two, haha, but when reality hit…

Hub was now a reasonably successful, middle-management accountant, and made a good living for them. Gave up his aspirations to be an ‘artiste’, well…LONG ago. Shortly after they got together, in fact. How dreams die…or, practically speaking, how ‘reality’ tends to settle in, making mincemeat of those ‘other plans’…

Still, it was a good life. Wasn’t it? A house in the ‘burbs; a steady paycheque…enough money to at least get the kids into college. What does it matter if the last time they had a proper vacation was…when was it again? But love: LOVE was the key. Saw them through thick and thin; gave her enough courage to get him past the point where he was finally able to emerge from the hospital, and with only a few scars to show for his troubles…and they now had matching ‘wrist bracelets’! Ones that never fully faded, in fact…they’d always have that.

He’d been a larger part of her life, at one time. Hell, when she thought about it, that’s all he ever really wanted – to be part of her life; to share her stories; help out when he could…and he did help, really he did. Those times when she was being stalked; even in later years when she cried on his shoulder over ‘family stuff’, when he’d really just stopped by to say hello. Yes, if he wasn’t offering moral support, it was…just about…BEING there. Someone to talk to…a *genuine* friend. An increasingly rarer commodity, particularly as life went on and it became so much more about kids, the mortgage, and just trying to make ends meet…

Good looking guy, too, for his age. Back then, at any rate. Been so long! Well, perhaps she’d keep the picture, if only for old-times sake. Maybe add it to her scrap-book! Yes, that’d be the thing to do, and no one’s the wiser.

Printing the picture, she then pulled her scrap-book out of the desk drawer. Finding just the right page, she applied glue stick to the picture’s backing next to the article from the paper.

‘March 27, 2030: [ ____ ] died peacefully surrounded by friends and family.’

…not ALL of his friends, she thought, closing the book and reaching for a tissue.

more ‘streams’

July 16, 2010

“I cam last night hard leaving the tape on kept me from coming back off that cloud of ecstacy for sometime i think it was around one that I finally sleapt.. this morning in the shower I rubbed my clit while slowly pullling off the tape I washed my quim and then your rose as you told me to do, as soon as the tape was completely off I came, I ended up on the floor of my tub I couldn’t even hold my self up, and am still shaking from the intensity of it…”

three minutes (actually)

July 1, 2010

Copyright 2010 Markee2baad’sosaad. All rights reserved.


6/06/2010 11:05:45 PM): Os are safe with me, I won’t lose them

6/06/2010 11:05:31 PM): when you’re ready – and you ARE – how long does it take

6/06/2010 11:06:33 PM): Given the right words, one or two minutes

6/06/2010 11:06:40 PM): hand in lap

6/06/2010 11:06:47 PM): between legs

6/06/2010 11:06:53 PM): SQUEEZING

6/06/2010 11:06:56 PM): TIGHTLY

6/06/2010 11:07:00 PM): clit

6/06/2010 11:07:03 PM): throbbing

6/06/2010 11:07:07 PM): touch it

6/06/2010 11:07:10 PM): PRESS

6/06/2010 11:07:13 PM): against it

6/06/2010 11:07:22 PM): DON’T cum, tho’

6/06/2010 11:07:24 PM): I dare ya

6/06/2010 11:07:43 PM): Mmmmm

6/06/2010 11:07:31 PM): press

6/06/2010 11:07:33 PM): HARDER

6/06/2010 11:07:52 PM): Is throbbing

6/06/2010 11:07:38 PM): DEEPER

6/06/2010 11:07:43 PM): SQUEEZE

6/06/2010 11:08:11 PM): Hard

6/06/2010 11:07:56 PM): with nipples, arching

6/06/2010 11:08:26 PM): Come

6/06/2010 11:08:45 PM): Please sir

6/06/2010 11:08:29 PM): come? please do

6/06/2010 11:08:42 PM): just ensure your hand travels below your cunt

6/06/2010 11:08:46 PM): down to your rose

6/06/2010 11:09:05 PM): Thank you

6/06/2010 11:08:54 PM): where MY tongue is

6/06/2010 11:09:39 PM): Ahhhhh

6/06/2010 11:09:29 PM): baby

6/06/2010 11:09:39 PM): you are SOO responsive

6/06/2010 11:10:02 PM): Leaves me breathless

6/06/2010 11:09:52 PM): one of the many reasons why I take SO much pride in ownership

6/06/2010 11:10:49 PM): I feel you here

6/06/2010 11:11:01 PM): Or should I say down there

6/06/2010 11:11:06 PM): would hope…EVERYWHERE

6/06/2010 11:11:40 PM): Yes Sir

6/06/2010 11:11:30 PM): yes?

6/06/2010 11:11:49 PM): Down to my toes

6/06/2010 11:11:39 PM): nipples

6/06/2010 11:11:43 PM): clit

6/06/2010 11:11:47 PM): and rose?

6/06/2010 11:12:15 PM): Yes sir

6/06/2010 11:12:33 PM): All

6/06/2010 11:12:24 PM): good

6/06/2010 11:13:08 PM): I hope you can feel it too

6/06/2010 11:13:07 PM): I do

6/06/2010 11:13:18 PM): wish I could feel a little MORE, butt…

6/06/2010 11:13:42 PM): Have to go

All right, then…

three little words

May 22, 2010

Copyright 2009. All rights reserved.


The message blinking beside his cursor was brief, but to the point.

With his jaw having dropped STRAIGHT into his lap, he couldn’t believe what he was reading.

So he read it again. And again.

Same reaction.


…aah, the power of words. And such small ones! Perhaps the tiniest, and most poignant expression ever uttered. Had the power to change minds, change hearts…

Change LIVES.

Why did it stir him so? Why did it have the power it did?

Knowing the answer, if indeed there were one, wouldn’t change anything, however. Some things were meant to be accepted as a gift, and leave it at that.

…or perhaps return the sentiment?

Why not.

One thing was certain: seemed there were mysteries enough in the world to keep his interest piqued for yet another day…

an gestalt

May 5, 2010

Copyright 2010. All rights reserved.


What I’d like for you to do

is to test

your temperature

so, naturally, you’ll want to unzip yourself

yes sir

let Me know

i feel hot sir

you unzipped?

yes sir

and how do you know you feel hot?

because the air felt cold…

you didn’t actually check for yourself?

would you like me to sir?

as a matter of fact…yes

and thank you for asking first, my precious

your welcome sir

yes indeed i am hot sir

how do you know?

my hand is warming up being pressed against just the outside skin; I did not want to touch the inside without your permission.

lovely – would you LIKE to press further inward?

yes sir i would

tell me about your vagina

if I were kneeling between your legs right now, what would I see?

pouts I am unsure how to describe it

why the pout?

cause i dislike being unsure…

I assume you are unshaven…

yes you would assume correctly

and how would you feel, were you asked to denude yourself?

denude? i am afraid i don’t understand…

hairless, darling


hmm I’ve never thought about it, would it please you if i were?

it is common for subs and slaves to have a clear runway

yes sir

but you have yet to tell Me how YOU would feel about it

hmm I don’t really care either way it’s just I know once I shave once I will have to keep doing it or it will be uncomfortable

indeed – well, it’s something to think about – sorry if we sort of got off-track

as I recall, you were checking your temperature for Me, which I gather isn’t quite as hot as it were…


no it isn’t, or?

It’s only cooled down a bit but not much

have fingers entered yet?

no sir you have not given me permission to do so

you may do so

I would like to know how warm it is

fairly warm a getting hotter by the second

mmm – good

how many fingers?

only one sir

just one?

may i add more?

how many?

one or two?

only two?

there’s a lot of room to move with two

well, there is that – and you’re moist enough for two?

oh yes i am very wet sir

eXXXcellent – very arousing, love

before you continue, tho’…

tell me about your nipples

describe them?

their state at the mo’

aching for attention…




if I were there, standing above you, would I be able to see them, poking thru?

my nipples aren’t that big sir but if you knew what to look for yes

and what should I be looking for?

and are your aureoles small as well?

sort of my aureoles are little larger than quarters, but my nipples are flat


I should say flat ish


so they’d take a little coaxing to bring them to life, is that the message I’m receiving?

not a lot of coaxing but a little

perhaps you could assist in the matter, then

what would you like me to do sir?

the same thing you’ve done for me in previous assignments

yes sir

feel Me


as you pinch

for Me

mmm yes sir

don’t neglect down below, however

think you’d be able to make another offering to Me?

yes sir


you’re ready?

I’ll want you to squeeze your breasts while you’re cumming – think you can manage that?

oh yes

maybe just one breast at a time, tho’, since you’ll need one hand for your vagina


it would make Me deliriously happy to know that you’ve cum for Me, love

mmmyes sir

so…please do, and let me know once you’ve done so


I came sir

and was it good for you?

oh yes sir it was

have you done this before?

no sir?

that sounded a little uncertain

I meant, have you ever cum on command like this

no sir

how did it feel?



if you’re truly interested in experiencing D/s, you may want to anticipate that this might occur on a regular basis, then

Yes sir thank you

this is about ‘control’ – your offering it, and it being accepted

preferably by someone that cares for you very much

yes sir

Began My day

April 13, 2010

With a FINE howdeedoo from a dearest and most lovedest.  She was out w/ da famb, buying groceries, as I was told after she responded to my message on her phone.  Just another ‘normal’ family outing – nothing out of the ordinary going on here, nope nope.

As if.

I asked, as I am wont to do, after all things of interest:  clothing choices covering nipples, clit and rose, whereupon I was informed – much to my delight – that, indeed, panties were no longer ‘fresh’ – certainly not as fresh as they were when she began the day.

Fine; good – off to a grand start – as it usually was with her.  Will let the rest of the text speak for itself:


shameless slut: Panties are blue and instantly moist for M

phlye: yum;   thank you, love… as I harden for YOU

shameless slut: Shivering w pleasure

phlye: bra? you KNOW I covet My nipples, almost as much as I lust for clit and anus

shameless slut: I squeeze my legs together and feel you

phlye: you’re sitting, then

shameless slut: Nipples hard

phlye: and how ARE…good – touch them

shameless slut: No. Leaning on a porch rail

phlye: how…casual

shameless slut: God

phlye: who could be the wiser?

shameless slut: Want you

phlye: knowing YOUR Master is…upside your asshole

phlye: RIPPING your cheeks apart

phlye: LICKING from cunt thru asshole

shameless slut: May I cum for M?

phlye: please

phlye: I love you, my delicious subby slut

shameless slut: Cumming

phlye: even MORE, every time you cum for Me

phlye: lovely

phlye: eXXXcellent turn-around time

phlye: I HOPE you’re messy – HOPE you wind up on unsteady knees

shameless slut: Anyone watching would think I’m having seisures

phlye: good

shameless slut: But no one is

phlye: pity – but a little embarrassment… goes a long way…


…and, on it went…actually, that was pretty much the eXXXtent of it…

For today.  For THIS time.

What will happen next?  Stay tuned!

Apr 02

April 2, 2010

Blue Man Group – Above

A ‘down’ (boy) day – nuttin’ doin’’; not even betwixt the bedsheets.  Cudda got it up, but certain differences of opinion rather blew the bliss…and that was that.

…in case there was any doubt about the ‘m’ part of this post’s delineation.  Yes, sometimes it’s good but, more often than knot, it’s about…unfulfilled expectations, desires left wanting…self-flagellation, by any other name.

Oh, at one point?  There were hints of nails, scratching down back…whispers of ‘lick my asshole…please!’ – but by that time?  ‘Don’t you fucking TOUCH me!’ was the response – and could you blame me?  Particularly if you knew what lead up to it?

Of course not.  How could you?  Hey: use your imagination!

Or trust me – it’s all the same in any case.

Will tomorrow be a better day?  Depends on whether the cyber world holds more promise than r/l, better known as ‘realityville’.  Sometimes, you know?  The touch of a keyboard holds more promise – latent or otherwise – than the cold light of dawn.

S/M journal

April 1, 2010

Apr 1 (no foolin’)

You were on my mind this morning – as you were at the end of last evening.  Having thoroughly dressed you down – at least in my mind – during our verbal intercourse the night before, by the time I’d slipped between the sheets I was ready for YOU to be ready.

Arriving at my bedside, naked and on bent knees, you would of course be given permission to ask ‘what would you wish of me, Sir?’ – and I would be most agreeable in my response.

‘Play with My titties.’

Gripping your breasts, you’d squeeze – as tightly as you could.  Taking nipples between thumb and index finger, you’d pull on them, stretching them toward me invitingly.  By this time, my cock would be tenting under the covers, wondering which of your holes would provide the most lube.  And while it’s your back door that I covet most, your other two holes would certainly be good for providing initial lubrication.

Presumptuous cunt that you be, you DARE to lift up the covers.  Meeting my gaze for reassurance, you take me in hand when met with no disapproval.

‘Suck me, bitch,’ I command, lying back – and, like the mischievous little slut you are…you tease me with barely a lick.

Grabbing your hair, I force you down.  Saliva pools at the base of my cock as you get to work, pumping me with mouth and fist.  In another act of inspired insolence, your free hand begins tickling my balls.  I groan when your fingers slowly slip inside my crack.

Just as my fingers tighten around your head, my little head gives way with a tremendous explosion.  Your fingers, which found my darkest hole, had pressed in deeply, finding my release button with barely a protest from me.

…at least initially…

Fool (for love)

March 30, 2010

Copyright 2008.  All rights reserved.


Just wanted you to know – I could’ve met up with other women today.

But I didn’t.

It’s YOU I want.

Finally realized that.  Yes, profound epiphany that it be, of all the ladies in my life, it is YOU I covet most.

…why is that?

Certainly isn’t because of anything you’ve done.  Not overtly, anyway.  Nor am I suggesting your neglect is out of malice aforethought.  It’s just – well, it’s ‘my’ thing, baybee.  And what my ‘thing’ reacts to – which just happens to be the memory of what we shared.

Not that I’m blind to all the stuff we HAVEN’T shared – you know, coffee confabs, intimate discussions around the weather and your health – all that ‘polite’ stuff.

As if it matters.  It does have its place, however – just never seemed to find a place within OUR confabs, huh.

How’d we manage to skip all that stuff?  I guess, if memory serves, we DID have some intimate discussions, on-line, whey back when, didn’t we.  Ran across some replies I meant to send – or did send – in response to our earliest, ‘getting to know each other’ discussions (talkin’ YEARS ago now…).  Don’t ask me why I still have ‘em – much less that I found them on my work computer, but…suffice it to say, they were there, and they reminded me.

So we’re not EXACTLY strangers – in the non-sexual sense, I mean.

Isn’t that a relief.  ;~>

At any rate – here I am, thinking of you, wanting you, and WRITING to you…when I could’ve been fucking someone else.

What kind of a fool am I, anyway?  ;-D

fine lines

March 18, 2010

…between fantasy/realty…fiction/truth…and S/M…where does one end and the other begin?

Sadly, answers won’t be found within this blog. Within every kernel of fiction will be a grain of truth (and vice-versa); extracted from every drop of pleasure will be the whisper of pain…

Butt, it’s ALL good.

Isn’ tit…